Fun_People Archive
30 Oct
Signs of the apocalypse #28193101

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 30 Oct 100 16:25:28 -0800
To: Fun_People
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Subject: Signs of the apocalypse #28193101

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Forwarded-by: Iggy Reko
Forwards smashing their cell phones ...

	Smart Tires to Warn Drivers Via Mobile Messages

HELSINKI (Reuters) - Talking cars may not yet be cruising the roads, but
in the not too distant future, drivers will start receiving real-time mobile
phone messages from their wheels, a Finnish tiremaker said on Monday.

In the first wave of intelligent tires, individual chips installed in each
wheel will work together to monitor tire pressure and temperature, reporting
changes to the driver's mobile phone, tiremaker Nokian Renkaat said.

No extra installations are necessary within the car itself, the only
requirement is that drivers own a phone that uses Bluetooth, a technology
that allows phones to communicate wirelessly with other devices, it said.

The plan is to develop the technology so that future tires will also warn
drivers of tire-wear, hydro-planing and slush-planing as well as informing
them of theft.

Nokian Tires, which is in the process of looking for development partners,
said the system would be available from next year, with trucks, vans and
high-speed rated passenger car tires being the first to be installed with
the smart chips.

Finnish Nokia Oyj Abp, the world's largest mobile phone maker, and U.S.
Flextronics International Ltd., maker of phone handsets, pagers and
computers, have taken part in developing the intelligent tire technology
with Nokian.

-- end article ---

[Yeah, this is just what I want, my tires calling my cell phone while I'm
 in the middle of an emergency driving maneuver.  I can see it now:

   (sound of heavy rain, thunder, etc.  the car begins to skid)
   Driver (fighting for control of the car): Oh crap ...
   Phone: ring, ring.
   Driver: What?
   Phone: Hi, this is your left front tire calling.  I just thought you'd
	want to know that the road is wet and slippery, and I'm in danger
	of skidding.
   Driver: Great, thanks for calling.  (hangs up)
   Phone: ring, ring.
   Driver: WHAT???
   Phone: Hi, this is your right front tire.  I've just talked to your left
	front tire, and we both think there's a danger of hydroplaning.
   Driver (fighting to keep the car moving in a straight line and talk on
	the phone at the same time): Gee, ya think?  (hangs up)
   Phone: ring, ring
   Driver: Fer chrissake, WHAT THE FUCK IS IT???????
   Phone: This is your left front tire again.  I don't seem to be able to
	hold onto the road, and there's a concrete wall over there that
	we're heading towards.
   Driver: AAAAAGGGGHHHH!  (crashing sounds)
   Phone: ring, ring  (falls open as the car tips over)
   Phone: Hello, this is your left rear tire.  I seem to have lost contact
	with the road.  Hello?  Is anybody there?  Hello???

   fade to black ...
]
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