Fun_People Archive
25 Sep
Food Haikus

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 25 Sep 100 16:16:56 -0700
To: Fun_People
Precedence: bulk
Subject: Food Haikus

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Repulsive odor!
Don't you dare open that fridge!
Leftovers gone bad.
-- -- --
Go to the Kitchen
Create a great tasting meal
Someone else clean up
-- -- --
Brownies for breakfast,
With a cup of hot coffee -
My day starts off right.
-- -- --
Dinner time comes soon
I search the fridge but in vain
Off to the diner!
-- -- --
Time for us to eat,
But I just walked in the door--
Leftovers again!
-- -- --
With hand in the jar
Diet-breaking cookie thief
Only crumbs are left.
-- -- --
You rotten oven!
Burnt my masterpiece again!
Shape up or ship out!
-- -- --
Smoke in the kitchen
Roast has become charcoal brick
Order pizza now
-- -- --
Almighty garlic,
Your aroma quite pungent,
Husband sleeps on couch.
-- -- --
I ate all my peas...
Can I have a cookie now?
Thanks Mom, you're the best!
-- -- --
Souffle is rising.
The children come through the door.
Slam! Have a pancake.
-- -- --
Autumn's in the air,
The time for tailgate parties:
Charcoal grills and beer!
-- -- --
A nice hard-cooked egg.
I'll peel it for my salad.
Oops. The yolk's on me!
-- -- --
My wife says I'm "plump".
I try not to eat too much.
Hey! Where's my pudding?!
-- -- --
Biscuits with butter
Steaming hot in a basket
My waistline groweth.
-- -- --
Funny little friend,
Sings "Home For The Hollandaise".
(I think he was sauced)

© 2000 Peter Langston