Fun_People Archive
1 May
Straight Talk -- Fourteen Tough Questions for Heterosexuals

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Sat,  1 May 99 15:42:25 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: Straight Talk -- Fourteen Tough Questions for Heterosexuals

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Forwarded-by: Jack Doyle <doylej@peak.org>
Forwarded-by: Kevin Johnsrude <kevinj@roguewave.com>
Forwarded-by: Joke of the Day <Joker@joker.org>

 1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

 2. When and how did you decide you were a heterosexual?

 3. Is it possible that your heterosexuality is just a phase that you may
 grow out of?

 4. Is it possible that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of
 others of the same sex?

 5. Do you parents know you are straight? Do your friends and/or roomates
 know?

 6. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality? Can't you just be
 who you are and keep it quiet?

 7. Why do heterosexuals put so much emphasis on sex?

 8. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to introduce others to their
 lifestyle?

 9. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you
 consider it wise to expose children to heterosexual teachers?

10. Just what do men and women do in bed together?

11. Bearing in mind the current divorce rate, why are there so few stable
 relationships between heterosexuals?

12. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race
 survive if everyone were heterosexual?

13. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals.  Techniques have been
 developed that might enable you to change if you really want to. Have you
 considered aversion therapy?

14. Would you want your child to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they
 would face?

© 1999 Peter Langston