Fun_People Archive
20 Jan
Bay Area Story Problems

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Wed, 20 Jan 99 13:40:27 -0800
To: Fun_People
Precedence: bulk
Subject: Bay Area Story Problems

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
[Yes, I had a wonderful week in the Bay Area, but I wasn't goofing off.
 After all, _somebody_ has to check the Fun_Facts and Fun_Figures in these
 Fun_Items... -psl]

Forwarded-by: Anton Sherwood <antons@jps.net>
[ further forwards looking for a mother-in-law unit ]

  _____ San Francisco Math Quiz _____

 1. Zelda and Jane were given a rottweiler at their commitment ceremony.
    If their dog needs to be walked two miles a day and they walk at a rate
    of 3/4 mile per hour, how much time will they spend discussing their
    relationship in public?

 2. Michael has two abusive stepfathers and an alcoholic mother.  If his
    self-esteem is reduced by 20% per dysfunctional parent, but Michael
    feels 3% better for every person he denigrates, how long will it take
    before he's ready to go home if 1 person walks by the cafe every 2
    minutes?

 3. Sanjeev has 7 piercings.  If the likelihood of getting cellulitis on
    any given day is 10% per piercing, what is the likelihood Sanjeev will
    need to renew his erythromycin prescription during the next week?

 4. Chad wants to take half a pound of pot to Orinda and sell it at a 20%
    profit.  If it originally cost him $1,500 in food stamps, how much
    should Nicole write the check for?

 5. The City and County of San Francisco decide to destroy 50 rats infesting
    downtown.  If 9,800 animal rights activists hold a candlelight vigil,
    how many people did each dead rat empower?

 6. A red sock, a yellow sock, a blue sock, and a white sock are tossed
    randomly in a drawer.  What is the likelihood that the first two socks
    drawn will be socks of color?

 7. George weighs 245 pounds and drinks two triple lattes every morning. If
    each shot of espresso contains 490mg of caffeine, what is George's
    average caffeine density in mg/pound?

 8. There are 4500 homes in Mill Valley and all of them recycle plastic. If
    each household recycles 10 soda bottles a day and buys one polar fleece
    pullover per month, does Mill Valley have a monthly plastic surplus or
    deficit?

    Bonus question:  Assuming all the plastic bottles are 1 liter size, how
    much Evian are they drinking?

 9. If the average person can eat one pork pot sticker in 30 seconds, and
    the waitress brings a platter of 12 pot stickers, how long will it take
    five vegans to not eat them?

10. Todd begins walking down Market Street with 12 $1 bills in his wallet.
    If he always gives panhandlers a single buck, how many legs did he have
    to step over if he has $3 left when he reaches the other end and met
    only one double-amputee?

  _____ Advanced Placement Students Only _____

11. Katie, Trip, Ling, John-John and Effie share a three-bedroom apartment
    on Guerrero for $2400 a month.  Effie and Trip can share one bedroom,but
    the other three need their own rooms with separate ISDN lines to run
    their web servers.  None of them wants to use the futon in the living
    room and they each want to save $650 in three months to attend Burning
    Man.  What is their best option:
    a. All five roommates accept a $12/hour job-share as handgun monitors
       at Mission High.
    b. Ask Miles, the bisexual auto mechanic, to share Effie and Trip's
       bedroom for $500/month.
    c. Petition the Board of Supervisors to advance Ling her annual
       digital-artists-of-color stipend.
    d. Rent strike

© 1999 Peter Langston