Fun_People Archive
13 Jul
The Comedian's-eye View of 07/14/98

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 13 Jul 98 23:20:55 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: The Comedian's-eye View of 07/14/98

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Excerpted-from: 07/14/98 -- ShopTalk

                         Tuesday July 14, 1998

	"It's like the bumper sticker: 'Manure happens.' Right now, we're
	 in the process of trying to wipe off ourselves."

		- Ted Turner, apologizing for the "Operation Tailwind" story

                               &&&&&&&&&&

Immoral Inklings: Pat Robertson said a month ago that asteroids and
hurricanes would hit Florida if Disney held Gay Day.  "you know he could
just kick himself for not throwing 'fire' in for old times' sake." (Argus
Hamilton)

International Performance: Disney's studio chief is defending the box office
prowess of "Armageddon."  He says it'll take in up to $185 million
domestically and lots more overseas.  "I guess Bruce Willis is a better
actor in another language." (Daily Scoop)

Going Up?: Thousands turned out for a new age music concert given by pianist
John Tesh in Palmdale, Calif.  "How they managed to cram that many people
into an elevator is still a mystery." (Bob Mills)

Lethal Age: The difference between "Lethal Weapon I" and "Lethal Weapon 4"?
"Extras are hired from homes for the aged." (Earl Hochman)

I Pledge to Whom?: John Schneider, a star of "The Dukes of Hazard,"
testified before the Senate urging that desecration of the American flag be
banned.  "When his testimony was over, the Senate thanked him and asked,
'Who the heck are you?'" (Conan O'Brien)

Small Spots: The people behind "Seinfeld" came up with an hour of highlights
from the past nine years and called it "The Clip Show." "UPN is following
with highlights from all their shows, but there's a problem.  They only have
about a 4-minute show."  (Andrew Wisot)

© 1998 Peter Langston