Fun_People Archive
2 May
The dangers of taking a service droid off script

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri,  2 May 97 14:10:22 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: The dangers of taking a service droid off script

Forwarded-by: Keith Bostic <bostic@bostic.com>
Forwarded-by: byron@netapp.com (Byron Rakitzis)
Forwarded-by: raymondc@microsoft.com (Raymond Chen)

So the 2.30p flight from San Jose to Seattle doesn't take off until 5p.
But that's a different story.  The point is it's now 8pm: I'm tired, I'm
irritable, I'm hungry, I'm lazy.  So I decide to avail myself of that
characteristically American service industry: The fast-food restaurant.

For reasons of privacy, I've changed the name of the establishment in
question and its star sandwich for the purpose of this narrative.  Let's
call it "Burger Kong" and "The Whimper".

I arrive at the counter and order a Whimper with cheese combo.

There is an odd pause.  A bad sign.  Upon further examination, I realize
why:  There is no "Whimper with cheese combo" on the menu.  There's a
"Whimper combo" and a "Bacon Whimper with cheese combo", but no "Whimper
with cheese combo."

Burger Kong Droid: You mean a Bacon Whimper with cheese combo?

Me: No, just a regular Whimper with cheese combo.

BKD: You mean a Whimper combo?

Me: No, a Whimper with cheese combo.

The BKD is now very confused.  So I decide to change my order to get the
ordeal over with.

Me: Nevermind. I'd like a Whimper combo. ...  Number 2 on the menu.

The BKD's demeanor suddenly changes:  I'm back on script!  Thus relieved,
the BKD then asks the next question on the script, the question that
demonstrates why this story is being retold:

BKD: Would you like cheese on your Whimper?

© 1997 Peter Langston