Fun_People Archive
20 Feb
Just say "no"

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Thu, 20 Feb 97 12:00:43 -0800
To: Fun_People
Subject: Just say "no"

Forwarded-by: Steve Hardaway <stehar@dfw.net>

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed
couple wanted to join a church.  The pastor said, "We have special
requirements for new parishioners.  You must abstain from having sex for
two weeks."

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.  The pastor went
to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the
two weeks?"

The old man replied, "No problem at all, Pastor." "Congratulations! Welcome
to the church!" said the pastor.

The pastor went to the middle-aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to
abstain from sex for the two weeks?"

The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to
sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes we made it."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church," said the pastor.

The pastor then went to the newlywed couple and asked, "Well, were you able
to abstain from sex for two weeks?"

"No Pastor, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young
man replied sadly.

"What Happened?" inquired the pastor.  "My wife was reaching for a can of
corn on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I
was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."

"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our
church," stated the pastor.

"We know." said the young man, "We're not welcome at Safeway anymore
either."

© 1997 Peter Langston