Fun_People Archive
25 Nov
OFFICE 97
Content-Type: text/plain
Mime-Version: 1.0 (NeXT Mail 3.3 v118.2)
From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 25 Nov 96 22:18:12 -0800
To: Fun_People
Subject: OFFICE 97
Forwarded-by: "Jack D. Doyle" <doylej@peak.org>
TOP TEN THINGS OVERHEARD AT THE OFFICE 97 ANNOUNCEMENT AT COMDEX
10. Actually, 97 isn't the release year. It's the percentage of
features you'll never use.
9. Sorry, Mr. Dole, that's not what we meant by "zero
administration."
8. Actually, 97 isn't the release year. It's the number of
megabytes a compact installation takes up.
7. We would have added more features, but all the good programmers
are at Netscape.
6. Actually, 97 isn't the release year. It's the number of
lawsuits we had to settle to be able to ship the thing.
5. Look out! I mean, Outlook!
4. Actually, 97 isn't the release year. It's how many times we
mentioned "Internet" in the press release.
3. That's not the AltaVista blimp...that's the advertising budget!
2. Actually, 97 isn't the release year. It's where our stock will
be if this doesn't fly.
1. Now, Bill, remember: it's Office 97, not "son of Bob."
© 1996 Peter Langston