Fun_People Archive
24 Oct
ULOTD - (Urban Legend...) - the FHA Loan Application

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Thu, 24 Oct 96 23:58:46 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: ULOTD - (Urban Legend...) - the FHA Loan Application
References: <199610232105.RAA19166@mongoose.bostic.com>

Forwarded-by: Keith Bostic <bostic@bsdi.com>
Forwarded-by: glen@substance.abuse.blackdown.org
Forwarded-by: Liem Bahneman <roland@cobaltgroup.com>
Forwarded-by: Richard Mittleman <richard@phys.washington.edu>

    A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA (Federal Housing Administration) loan
for a client.  He was told that the loan would be granted if he could prove
satisfactory title to property offered as collateral.  The title dated back
to 1803, and he had to spend three months running it down.  After sending
the information to FHA, he got this reply: "We received your letter today
enclosing application for loan for your client, supported by abstract of
title.  Let us compliment you on the able manner in which you prepared and
presented the application.  However, you have not cleared the title before
the year 1802, and therefore, before final approval can be accorded the
application, it will be necessary that the title be cleared back to that
year."
    Annoyed, the lawyer replied: "Your letter regarding titles in Case No.
189156 received.  I note that you wish titles extended further back than I
have presented them.  I was unaware that any educated man in the world
failed to know that Louisiana was purchased from France in 1803.  The title
to the land was acquired by France by right of conquest from Spain.  The
land came into possession of Spain by right of discovery made in 1492 by a
sailor named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of
seeking a new route to India by the then reigning monarch, Isabella.  The
good queen, being a pious woman and careful about titles, almost as much I
might say, as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the
Pope for the voyage before she sold her jewels to help Columbus.  Now the
Pope, as you know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God,
it is commonly accepted, made the world.  Therefore, I believe it is safe
to presume that He also made that part of the world called Louisiana, and
I hope to hell you are satisfied."

© 1996 Peter Langston