Fun_People Archive
6 Sep
A Few Catholic Jokes

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri,  6 Sep 96 11:25:36 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: A Few Catholic Jokes

Forwarded-by: Jascha Franklin-Hodge <JoeShmoe@Misty.com>

When Sister Catherine asked all the Catholic school children in fourth grade
what they wanted to be when they grew up, little Sheila said, "When I grow
up, I want to be a prostitute!"  Sister Catherine's eyes grew wide and she
yelped, "What did you say?!"  "A prostitute!" Sheila repeated.  Sister
Catherine breathed a sight of relief, "Oh Thank God!  I thought you said a
Protestant."


A nun was walking home from the convent one day, when a wild-eyed man jumped
out from the bushes and "had his way" with her.  As he was rearranging his
clothes, the man asked, mockingly, "What will you tell the Holy Father now,
Sister?"  She says, "I must always tell the truth!  I will say I was walking
home from the convent when a man leaped out from the bushes and raped me,
twice, unless you're too tired."


Father Leach decides to pay a visit to a nearby convent.  The convent is in
a run-down neighborhood, and as the priest walks down the street several
prostitutes approach and proposition him.  "Twenty bucks a trick!"  These
solicitations embarrass Father Leach who lowers his head and hurries on
until he gets to the convent.  Once inside, he displays his naivete by
asking the Mother Superior, in a whisper, "Mother Superior, what is a
trick?"  She whispers back, "Twenty bucks -- just like on the street."

© 1996 Peter Langston