Fun_People Archive
31 Aug
The Comedian's Eye View from 8/30/96


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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Sat, 31 Aug 96 09:43:45 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: The Comedian's Eye View from 8/30/96

Excerpted-from: 8/30/96 -- ShopTalk

"I hate Dole!  I hate Clinton! It's like choosing your
 favorite Menendez Brother."
	- Joan Rivers

Bill Clinton had planned a big entrance for his acceptance speech last
night, says Argus Hamilton.  "It's a right on message. He was to appear on
stage in a wheelchair, dressed in a gorilla suit, carrying a child he's just
rescued from Newt Gingrich."

Says the Cutler Daily Scoop, "Hillary's speech reinforced one of the major
themes of the campaign: The wrong Clinton and Dole are running."

o  Adds Bill Maher, "Some folks thought she would wander into the crowd like
Elizabeth Dole did. But she realized it might be too easy to get a subpoena."

The GOP keynote speaker in San Diego had her baby with her. The Democratic
keynoter had TWIN babies with him. Says Hamilton, "Kathie Lee is starting
to wonder why she's the only one who gets picked on for exploiting children.

On opening night, all the Democratic delegates were dancing the Macarena.
Says Cutler, It's perfect for a Clinton convention. Every few seconds you
change your position.

Meanwhile, Bob Dole is relaxing in Santa Barbara this week. Says Alan Ray,
"The break is giving him time to catch up on the top domestic program on
his agenda: 'Matlock'."


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