Fun_People Archive
27 Aug
Jewish Pick-Up Lines

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Tue, 27 Aug 96 14:06:58 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: Jewish Pick-Up Lines

Forwarded-by: Eric Steese <ecscc@olywa.net>
Forwarded-by: Sue Zirin

JEWISH PICK-UP LINES
(Published by Punch Bowl (U of Penn) Winter '95 issue)

 1. Do you wanna see my Haftorah portion?
 2. I got a trust fund for my bar/bat mitzvah, what'd you get?
 3. Do you want to spin my dreidle?
 4. Your father must have been a rabbi because he stole the vowels from the
    Torah and put them in your eyes.
 5. What's a nice Jew like you doing eating scrapple like this?
 6. Thats a nice-looking yarmulke you're wearing, but it would look even
    better lying next to my bed tomorrow morning.
 7. Can I put my Torah in your ark?
 8. Is that a mezuzzah in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
 9. Can I part your Red Sea?
10. I've got ten commandments you can follow.
11. Going out with me is like having Chanukah all year long.
12. Want to wander through my desert?
13. I've got a Ramses in my wallet that wants to put you back in slavery.
14. I've got six pieces of gelt and a grogger back at my place.
15. Nice talis, want to fuck?
16. Why don't you bring your matzoh balls over here next to my gefilte fish.
17. Why should we recline tonight instead of on all other nights?
    Cause I'm holy, baby. Real holy.
18. Some guys use whip cream. I'm a potato latke man myself.

© 1996 Peter Langston