Fun_People Archive
11 Jun
In Search of the Perfect Recording of Pachelbel's Canon

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Tue, 11 Jun 96 13:29:34 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: In Search of the Perfect Recording of Pachelbel's Canon

Forwarded-by: "Cantor,Steven" <stevenc@hevanet.com>

Pachebel's Canon: The Interminable Discography, Simony & Shyster, 1994

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Leopold Stokowski directing the Chamber Orchestra  of Europe through an
interpretor. Privately reissued by the Stokowski Recording Society, Box
60567902367, Jim Thorpe, Pa.

Theodolphus Hypolete on the kinky Wurlitzer of the Order of Odd Fellows,
Missoula, MT, Piker Recordings, Kluj, Roumania

E. Nominal Bigwig improvising on "Pachebel's Kanon" and other baroque
trifles on the humungous pipes of Crystal Cathedral, Thousand Wallets,
CA, Phony Non-Essentials, 6cds, $4.99 a pair.

Kirsten Flaccid  singing a dubbed duet obbligato to words by Sir Hardy
Hamilton and transposed by John Williams, Bernard Hermann, Eric Korngold,
Franz Waxman and Flo Zeigfeld and accompanied by Gonad Schimmelheim on
the augmented piccolo. Testicles Pressing, c/o Postmistress, Dipstick,
England

Herbert Von Karryon-and-on recorded this work thrice with the [East]
Berlin Philharmonic, six times with the Vienna Boys Choir and once with
the Deutsche Grammaphon Gesellschaft Studio Synthesizer at
Gesundtheitztroggenburgenstock until he got it right. His last version
made just after he died is recommended [by Herbert Von Karajan] as were
all the previous ones. 12 minutes, DGG Vanity Series, $23.50

Donnie and Marie accompanied by the  St. Adrenal-in-the-Gland Church
Handbell Ringers, Zebulon, MO, Teledecked

Jocko, the Singing Spaniel, owned by Mrs. Maurice Kwistley-Mosbacker,
Upper Quarrelsome, England. London Lobster Shift Series

The Buda String Qt. [the Pests refused to play this lousey work]
Freebooter Recordings, Vaduz, Lichenstein

Dame Edwina Thornquist, basso-soprano, singing it to a poem by Reginald
Twirp entitled "Only God Could Mate Pachelbel with Gymnosperm and Create
Jell-O" D'Agastino's Groceries and other Affronts

The University of Tegucigalpa Left-Marching Band, conducted by Howard
Hamstrung, and packed with Che Guevara Spicy Barbecue Sauce

Virgil Fox in the errata version by Winslow Fraganaud on a salvaged Riggs
and Stratton valveless ethanol-powered organ at Mom's Mortuary and Hubcap
Shop, Winnemucca, NV.

Tap Dance Adaptation, Radio City Music Hall Rockettes in a ballet by Aaron
Copland and choreography by Martha Graham. RCA Laserdisc 20578

Victor Borge playing the variations by Anton Bruckner during a break in
Chopin's Fantasie Impromptu. "Livid Music To Buy" Bis 20-78955

Albert Shanker and Yehudi Menuhin in a Vedic setting in a collection of
traditional mantras, Virgin Classics

The following list of out-of-print transcriptions was compiled by Sir
Ruford Mange before his tragic drowning in the waters off his master
bedroom:
Wanda Landowska, Harpsichord
Larry Adler, Harmonica
Spike Jones, Washboard
Harpo Marx, Trombone

© 1996 Peter Langston