Fun_People Archive
29 May
A Marriage Made in Heaven

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Wed, 29 May 96 14:13:06 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: A Marriage Made in Heaven

Forwarded-by: "JUDY L SCHER" <scherj@lanecc.edu>
Forwarded-by: MIKE PALANDRI <palandri@eug4ja.lane.edu>

There was a young couple, very much in love, who were killed in a tragic
automobile accident the night before they were to be married.  They found
themselves at the pearly gates of heaven being escorted in by Saint Peter.

After a couple of weeks in heaven, the prospective groom took Saint Peter
aside and sad, "Saint Peter, my finance and I are very happy to be in
heaven, but we miss very much having the opportunity to celebrate our
wedding vows.  Is it possible for people in heaven to get married?"

Saint Peter said "I've never heard of anyone in heaven wanting to get
married.  You'll have to talk to the Lord God Almighty about that.  Let's
see...  I can get you an appointment for two weeks from Wednesday."

Come the appointed day, the couple were escorted by the guardian angels into
the presence of the Lord God Almighty, where they repeated the request.
The Lord looked at them solemnly and said, "I tell you what, wait five
years, and if you still want to get married, come back and we will talk
about it again."

Five years went by and the couple, still very much wanting to get married,
came back.  The Lord God Almighty with a pained look said, "You must wait
another five years and perhaps then I will be able to consider your request."

After another five years had passed they returned, for the third time, now
ten years after their first request, to ask the Lord again if they might
marry.  This time the Lord smiled and answered, "Yes, you may marry.  This
Saturday at 2:00 p.m. we will have a beautiful ceremony in the main chapel.
The reception will be on me!"  The wedding went beautifully, all the guests
thought the bride was beautiful.  Moses brought some flowers from the Nile
River Delta and Ghandi came wearing his finest hand-woven sari.

But as you may have guessed, the couple had been married but a few weeks
when they realized they had made a horrible mistake, and that they just
couldn't stay married to one another.  So, they made another appointment to
see the Lord God Almighty, this time to ask if they could get a divorce in
heaven.

When the Lord heard their request, He looked at them in horror and said,
"If it took us ten years to find a priest up here in heaven, do you have
any idea how long it'll take to find a lawyer?"

© 1996 Peter Langston