Fun_People Archive
9 May
Unabomber Haikus
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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Thu, 9 May 96 13:53:46 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: Unabomber Haikus
Forwarded-by: joev@halcyon.com
Forwarded-by: "Chuck Pliske" <chuckp@u.washington.edu>
UNABOMBER HAIKUS - APRIL 1996
Do you like my beard?
Please tell me you like my beard
Or I'll blow you up
Machines done ruined
Western Civilization
Think I'll mail some bombs
I have a vision
But I am misunderstood
Do you like my beard?
Option: Suicide
Perhaps I'll send a letter
To myself in jail
Harvard boy--upset.
Didn't get the attention
Of upper class chicks
Ed McMahon of Death
You may already be a
Winner! Open me!
Bad Unabomber!
Blowing people all to hell.
Do you take requests?
Why can't I get this
Stupid computer to print?
Time to buy some stamps.
Manifesto. Oops.
What a giveaway. Next time
No windy essays
Kind of ironic
Hates technology lots but
Has two typewriters
Should I comb my hair
Or should I wear it matted
The judge likes it combed
Remember when you
Laughed at his fake fur parka?
He remembers, too.
"Open your present..."
"No, you open your present..."
Kaczinski Christmas
I was your math prof.
You made fun of my weird ways.
It was all your fault.
It's circumstantial
All that stuff in my cabin
I found it all--yeah
How irritable
I've become, wiping my butt
With leaves and tree bark.
© 1996 Peter Langston