Fun_People Archive
10 Mar
This old mainframe...

Date: Sun, 10 Mar 96 21:10:13 -0800
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: This old mainframe...

Forwarded-by: Pat Parseghian <pep@research.att.com>
Forwarded-by: Marc Staveley
orig. src unknown....


"Proposed shows for a new cable channel targeting information systems
professionals."


This Old Mainframe - Host Bob Vila revamps a Univac and shows you how
       you can turn an old PC into a functional doorstep or other
       decorative object.

Name That Software - Contestants attempt to identify well-known
       business programs by looking at the least number of lines of code.

My Three Suns - Neighbors wonder why Steve Douglas keeps three UNIX
       based work-stations in a suburban neighborhood.

Wang Can Cook - Chef Charles Wang blends together software in an
       incomprehensible manner from companies he's purchased.  Studio
       guests grudingly pay ever higher prices for his creations.

Leave it to Spindler - The Spindler tries to earn money by selling
       apples but finds he can't sell them for as much as he paid for
       them; tries to make it up in volume.  Ward, June and the Board of
       Directors sigh.

WordPerfect Strangers - Larry decides that using groupware would be a
       good way to meet women, but Balki's laser printer explodes ruining
       any chances of connectivity.

Mayberry CPU - Andy discovers that his digital clock has more
       intelligence than Goober.  Aunt Bee debugs Floyd's electronic cash
       register.

The Honeymooners - Ralph dreams up a way to hit it rich with a 3-D
       word processor, but it turns out to be vaporware.  Ed makes
       millions creating "Norton's Utilities".

Mr. Rom's Neigborhood - Mr.  Rom puts young ones to sleep by reading
       selections from various IBM documentation.

Says Me Street - Muppet like forms of Bill Gates, Larry Ellison and
       Scott McNealy show children how to work and play together on the
       information highway.  Large character known as Big BlueBird is a
       favorite of the kids although no one really knows why.

© 1996 Peter Langston