Fun_People Archive
6 Nov
WhiteBoardness 11/3/95

Date: Mon, 6 Nov 95 13:55:09 -0800
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: WhiteBoardness 11/3/95

Excerpted-from: WhiteBoard News for November 03, 1995

Fast News Forum:

One of 300 balloons released from Rose Elementary school in Roseburg,
Oregon, a week ago, was found 900 miles away at DSET Labs in New River,
Arizona.  The balloons carried students' pledges to stay away from illegal
drugs.

New York City police broke down a woman's door, looking for a decomposing
corpse, after neighbors reported a telltale smell coming from her apartment.
She had left overcooked collard greens on her kitchen stove.

An armed man in a Halloween mask who tried to hold up the Cedar Glen Golf
Course clubhouse in Saugus, Massachusetts, fled after one patron pulled off
the mask and others laughed, police said.

Raoul Payette, 59, a computer systems manager for the Navy in Newport, Rhode
Island, admitted he shot co-worker Mary Ann Corriveau in the neck after his
screen flashed "Eliminate barriers to quality."  Corriveau survived.

Fish and Wildlife service scientists plan to kill about 40 stocky, black
sea ducks called surf scoters around Commencement Bay, Washington, to find
out why their numbers are declining.

A federal judge in Burlington, Vermont, has rejected former Lt. Governor
Brian Burns' request for a new fraud trial.  Burns, 56, said he should get
a new trial because a prosecutor gave a sarcastic standing ovation to his
weeping defense lawyer.

Okaloosa County, Florida, storm victims are getting property tax bills even
now, though they may have lost everything to Hurricane Opal.  The bills are
based on values as of January 1.

Mary Malecky is suing the town of East Hartford, Connecticut, along with
the school board, for $15,000 on claims she suffered cuts and bruises when
a toilet in an adjacent stall exploded at East Hartford Middle School.

Alma Ellis says she ought to call her dog Trouble.  The 8-month-old
Chihuahua, named Tara, somehow dialed 911, drawing the Carlsbad, New Mexico,
police to her home when she wasn't there.

Sam, the 12-foot alligator who has basked for 23 years in a pond behind the
Dallas County (Alabama) Jail, would not give up his good life when gator
handlers from the Birmingham Zoo came to take him away.  Everybody showed
but Sam.

Illinois Death Row inmate George Delvecchio, 47, asked the state Supreme
Court to delay his November 22 execution because a heart attack has made
him unfit to die.  The state has no law against executing someone due to
bad health, prosecutors say.

Margie Ostrower of Scarsdale, New York, has formed Time of the Month
Incorporated to introduce her blend of chocolate and "salty-crunchy things"
that she plans to market to women as a menstrual snack: PMS Crunch.

Evelyn Daniels, 27, was re-arrested in June in Fort Lauderdale, Florida,
where she'd been under house arrest on drug charges.  According to police,
her latest crime occurred when she was short on cash: She sold the
monitoring device the court had installed to keep tabs on her for $5, to a
pawnshop.

Kevis Rejuvenation Programs Incorporated is marketing a shampoo that
contains a cloned version of hyaluronic acid -- the acid found in human
sperm.  The acid adds body to hair, but since sperm sells for $5,000 a
kilogram, Kevis says it must charge $25 a bottle for its shampoo.

Christopher Ashley, 23, spent three days in the Norwood, New York, jail for
failing to return three library books he checked out in 1992.

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© 1995 Peter Langston