Fun_People Archive
18 Sep
A Few Ambiguous Headlines

Date: Mon, 18 Sep 95 15:15:29 -0700
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: A Few Ambiguous Headlines

Forwarded-by: danpeck@panix.com (Dan Peck)

	AMBIGUOUS HEADLINES

o Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Experts Says
o Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers
o Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
o Drunk Gets Nine Months In Violin Case
o Survivor Of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
o Farmer Bill Dies In House
o Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
o Is There A Ring Of Debris Around Uranus?
o Stud Tires Out
o Prostitutes Appeal To Pope
o Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
o Soviet Virgin Lands Short Of Goal Again
o British Left Waffles On Falkland Islands
o Eye Drops Off Shelf
o Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
o Clinton Wins On Budget, But More Lies Ahead
o Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
o Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus To 66
o Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax
o Miners Refuse To Work After Death
o Juvenile Court To Try Shooting Defendant
o Stolen Painting Found By Tree
o Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies
o 2 Sisters Reunited After 18 Years In Checkout Counter
o Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In 10 Years
o Never Withhold Herpes Infection From Loved One
o Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 In '84

© 1995 Peter Langston