Fun_People Archive
7 Mar
mini-AIR March 95 - Top Quark tour, nematodes and heiroglyphs

Date: Tue,  7 Mar 95 11:39:40 PST
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: mini-AIR March 95 - Top Quark tour, nematodes and heiroglyphs

From: The Annals of Improbable Research <marca@MIT.EDU>
Excerpted-from: mini-AIR March 95

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1995-03-03 In Defense of Cindy Crawford

We must rise to defend the honor of a noted researcher, Cindy Crawford.

In mini-AIR 1995-02 we announced the premiere of the new AIR column "Cindy
Crawford Discovers," which reports on the scientific efforts and
achievements of supermodel Cindy Crawford (and her ilk) as documented in
research journals such as "Vogue," "Cosmopolitan," "Elle," etc.

The following day we received an inquiry from the magazine "Entertainment
Weekly,"  seeking an advance copy of the first column.  We duly faxed a copy
of the colunm, which concerns Cindy Crawford's recent achievements in
chemistry.

A day later, Entertainment Weekly's editors informed us that they consider
Cindy Crawford's scientific achievements "too insubstantial" to report.

We must take exception.  In our view, Crawford's lack of a Ph.D.  in no way
disqualifies her from conducting research with shampoos.  To see this, one
need look no further than her report concerning "a patented outrageous
formula... enriched with pro-vitamin B5, silk protein and moisture-binding
silicone." (The full text of Crawford's paper appears on page 11 of the
January, 1995 issue of the research journal "Vogue.")

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© 1995 Peter Langston