Fun_People Archive
28 Aug
What did you expect?
Date: Sun, 28 Aug 94 18:06:35 PDT
To: Fun_People
Subject: What did you expect?
[Excerpts from "Life 2.7" -psl]
Forwarded-by: cate3@netcom.com (Henry Cate)
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"A fool and his money are soon ... Republican."
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During the Arab - Israeli war, the Israeli army ran out of beer. They
dutifully ordered a new stock which arrived by land via Egypt. Anxious
to check whether their beer had been poisoned, they sent a sample to the
lab for analysis. Ten days later came the reply - "Congratulations,
your camel is pregnant".
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Definition: A manager is a person who thinks that nine women can produce
a child in one month.
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A man was praying to God one evening and asked God, "God, in terms of
the vastness of your power and knowledge, what does a million years mean
to you?" God replied, "A second." Then the man asked, "And, in terms
of the vastness of your power and knowledge, what does a million dollars
mean to you?" God replied, "A penny." All excited, the man asked,
"Well, then, can I borrow a penny?" to which God replied, "In a second."
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On a tombstone:
Here lies an atheist, all dressed up and nowhere to go.
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According to a recent government publication ...
A billion seconds ago Harry Truman was president.
A billion minutes ago was just after the time of Christ.
A billion hours ago man had not yet walked on earth.
A billion dollars ago was late yesterday at the U.S. Treasury.
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© 1994 Peter Langston