Fun_People Archive
10 May
It isn't smoking pot if you don't inhale

Date: Tue, 10 May 94 17:53:38 PDT
To: Fun_People
Subject: It isn't smoking pot if you don't inhale

From: LISSY@AppleLink.Apple.COM (Abraham, Lisanne)
 
  - It isn't tabloid reporting if you're only reporting that the tabloids
    reported it.
  - You're still sober as lounge as you can still say your worms promperly.
  - It isn't a preexisting condition unless you had it before you existed.
  - You're not fat if clothes are actually made in your size.
  - You are not guilty of DUI if you thought someone else was driving.
  - It isn't vote fraud unless you can prove those dead guys would have voted
    the other way.
  - You are not abusing drugs if you store them in a cool, dry place and never
    yell at them.
  - It is not premaritial sex if you have no intention of getting married.
  - It is not speeding if there are still cars in front of you.
  - It isn't adultery if she reminds you of your wife.
  - It isn't reckless driving if you get into a wreck.
  - You are not overweight if you can still touch somebody's toes.
  - It isn't procrastination if you decide to postpone it right now.
 

© 1994 Peter Langston