Fun_People Archive
11 Apr
Re: SPAM JAKE DAY

Date: Mon, 11 Apr 94 16:22:13 PDT
To: Fun_People
Subject: Re: SPAM JAKE DAY

[Okay, is anyone in Anchorage?  Or does anyone know anyone in Anchorage with an
email address?  What good is the info electrobahn if it can't help out here?  -psl]

From: dz@seanews.akita.com (John S. Ullman)

Someone should alert Mr. Whitekeyes at the Fly By Night club in 
Anchorage, Alaska.  Mr. Whitekeyes serves a free Spam dinner with each 
bottle of Dom Perignon orderd at his establishment.  His house band, The 
Spamtones, recieved a cease and desist letter from Hormel a few years 
ago.  

[And in case you don't remember the original posting... -psl]


> Forwarded-by: bostic@vangogh.CS.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic)
> Forwarded-by: jr@opal.com Sun Apr  3 22:05:37 1994
> Forwarded-by: pferd@netcom.com (Kevin Kelm)
> 
> SPAM JAKE DAY -- A Summary
> --------------------------
> 
> 	By Reverend Brother Lee Harvey Oswald Smith, KSC WMD SPAM
> 	Episkopos, John Friedrich Cabal, Discordian Society
> 
> 1) WHAT IS A JAKE? (AND WHERE CAN I GET SOME?)
> ----------------------------------------------
> 
> A Jake is defined as part of Operation Mindfuck. Basically, it involves
> a lot of people collaborating to send a lot of weird stuff to some
> bureaucrat/official/someone somewhere, asking for some information/help/
> whatever, preferably in an obscure or unusual way. The letters are timed to 
> arrive on the same day, and to make the bureaucrat/official/etc. think
> that either he is the target of a global conspiracy of lunatics or the
> general public are much more imaginative than he has previously thought.
> 
> 2) WHAT IS THIS SPAM JAKE?
> --------------------------
> 
> The plan: on Spam Jake Day (the twenty-third of May, 1994), a lot of
> mail will arrive at the headquarters of Hormel Foods, the manufacturer
> of Spam, from all over the world. This will be from various Discordian,
> SubGenius and other weird religious groups; on official letterhead
> (which looks rather weird), and from people with long, bizarre religious
> titles. Each letter will claim that the sender's own group is the
> original Church of Spam (with appropriate embellishments), and
> requesting official endorsement from Hormel Foods as such.
> 
> 3) HOW DO I GET INVOLVED?
> -------------------------
> 
> If you wish to be involved in this global mindfuck, all you have to do
> is write such a letter, in the name of your religion/conspiracy (if you
> don't have one, found one), adding any embellishments you may wish to
> add and send it to:
> 
> 	Hormel Foods
> 	Corporate Offices
> 	1 Hormel Drive
> 	Austin, MN 55912
> 
> Send the letter before Spam Jake Day, if possible timing it so that it
> arrives on Spam Jake Day. The rest is fnord up to you.
> 
> 4) WHAT WILL THIS ACHIEVE?
> --------------------------
> 
> With luck, somebody at Hormel will find their desk inundated with
> curious missives from all sorts of strange groups from all over the
> world asking for official sanction for some esoteric activity involving
> Spam, or, in the parlance, "weird shit". Unable to dismiss this as a small, 
> localised prank they will be very much puzzled by this and possibly
> shall attain illumination from the shock. Candidates for official
> approval may receive interesting replies; furthermore, the media may pick
> up on this, distorting it and adding further chaos to the equation.
> In any case, the ripples of this should be felt far and wide, if enough
> people get involved.
> 
> 5) WHY SHOULD I GET INVOLVED?
> -----------------------------
> 
> Because if you don't, ye shall verily be transformed into a
> Precious Mao Button and distributed to the Poor in the Region of Thud.
> Or not.
> 
> --
>           Reverend Brother Pope Lee Harvey Oswald Smith, KSC WMD SPAM
>   Episkopos, John Friedrich Cabal; High Epopt of the Secret and Terrible Rite
> Chairperson dei gratia, Flat Earth Society -"In your heart, you know it's flat"
>      President-for-life, Don't Let Lieutenant Wilkes Breed Society Society
>    Think about about -><- Stop casting porosity -><- Keep the lasagna flying

© 1994 Peter Langston