Fun_People Archive
10 Apr
Things to ponder and (maybe) agree with

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 10 Apr 100 15:46:52 -0700
To: Fun_People
Precedence: bulk
Subject: Things to ponder and (maybe) agree with

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Forwarded-by: Laugh in Stock <jgagnon@aupelf-uref.org>
From: Earle W. Smith
And yet another from friend Basil, of Edmonton AB.  Enjoy.

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ADULT:

A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the
middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:

A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL:

Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:

The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:

A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST:

Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:

Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIP:

A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.

HANDKERCHIEF:

Cold Storage.

INFLATION:

Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MYTH:

A female moth.

MOSQUITO:

An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN:

Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET:

Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON:

A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE:

The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:

One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN:

An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:

Something other people have. You have character lines.

© 2000 Peter Langston