Fun_People Archive
24 Jul
The Comedian's-eye View of 07/24/98

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri, 24 Jul 98 00:57:08 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: The Comedian's-eye View of 07/24/98

X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649
Excerpted-from: 07/24/98 -- ShopTalk

                         Friday July 24, 1998

     "Ken Starr has become the Captain Ahab of this investigation -
      he's obsessed with bringing down the white whale."

					- Rep. Barney Frank, D-Mass.

                               &&&&&&&&&&

Better Days: The post office will be commemorating the '50s with a new
collection of stamps. "If the Postal Service really wants to remember the
'50s, bring back the 3-cent price." (Kenny Noble Cortes)

Young Jerry: "A former guest on the Jerry Springer Show says the host got
her pregnant.  She knows the child is his.  After just a few weeks, he's
already started kicking." (Alan Ray)

Charity Choosing: According to the New York Post, the money for Paula Jones'
$9,000 nose job came from an anonymous donor.  "That's when you know you're
unattractive, when strangers just send you cash.  'Lady, I saw you.  Here,
fix your nose!'" (Jay Leno)

The Great Magician: Actor-comedian Tommy Davidson has been named Magic
Johnson's new sidekick on "The Magic Hour."  "He'd have an easier time
reviving Sinatra than reviving that show." (Premiere)

Another Bite: Mayor Giuliani says it may take more than bikinis or T- shirts
to put the city's sex clubs in line with a new zoning ordinance.  Many club
owners say they will cover up their exotic dancers to prepare for city
inspectors' visits.  "Inspectors will be armed with clipboards, citation
slips and $1 and $5 bills." (Mark Wheeler)

© 1998 Peter Langston