Fun_People Archive
15 Sep
The Comedian's Eye View of 9/15/97

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 15 Sep 97 03:39:45 -0700
To: Fun_People
Subject: The Comedian's Eye View of 9/15/97

Excerpted-from: 9/15/97--ShopTalk

                         Monday September 15, 1997

	"San Francisco 49ers QB Steve Young was cleared to play this week
	by his neurologist and neurosurgeon after suffering another
	concussion, his sixth, against Tampa Bay.  This reminds me of the
	pumpkin I had in my sophomore year of college.  When we first got
	it, the pumpkin was firm and solid.  But we never cleaned up our
	room, and as the months went by, that pumpkin got mushier and
	moldier.  Hey Steve!  It's May, we're going home, and your brain is
	our pumpkin!"
			- Dave the Predictor

                               &&&&&&&&&&

"The Florida Board of Medicine has issued an emergency order banning the
diet drug combination fen-phen for 90 days, but stopped short of an outright
ban on Richard Simmons." (Jim Rosenburg)

"The death of Princess Diana drew a huge television audience, prompting the
FOX network to consider a new special 'When Royals Attack!'"

"Larry King wrote a first person account of his wedding and heart surgery
in USA Today in which he confessed his love for Shawn, his fear of death,
and the fact that he proposed to his Nurse Assistant."

"A Judge ruled that a two-year-old girl was an "orphan" because she was born
from artificial insemination of a donor egg fertilized by sperm implanted
in a surrogate mother. The two year old, meanwhile, is claiming that Bill
Cosby is her father." (Rosenburg)

"Nineteen states were awarded a total of $4 million in grants to make school
meals more nutritious and appealing. Kids voted to use the money to hire
more attractive cafeteria workers in an effort to improve their appetite."
(Rosenburg)

"The new fall TV season premieres this week.  No more hours and hours of
re-runs in the schedule.  That will start next week." (Alan Ray)

"Jerry Seinfeld's show has certainly changed its audience.  When it first
premiered, his girlfriend was not old enough to stay up and watch it." (Ray)

"Ken Griffey, Junior is chasing Roger Maris' home run record.  Of course,
Mo Vaughn is trying to establish a Boston Red Sox record.  No one in Fenway
Park has ever hit more than 40 fans." (Ray)
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