A Very Stringy Piece of Flesh (from the Wilds of the Pacific
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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri, 26 Apr 96 16:52:53 -0700
Subject: A Very Stringy Piece of Flesh (from the Wilds of the Pacific
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BREMERTON, WA - Christopher Coulter and his wife, Emily, were engaging in
bondage games when Christopher suggested spreading peanut butter on his
genitals and letting Rudy, their Irish Setter, lick them clean. Sadly, Rudy
lost control and began tearing at Christopher's penis and testicles.
Rudy refused to obey commands and a panicked Emily threw a half-gallon
bottle of perfume at the dog. The bottle broke, covering the dog and
Christopher with perfume. Startled, Rudy leaped back, tearing away the
While trying to get her unconscious husband in the car to take him to the
hospital, Emily fell twice, injuring her wrist and ankle. Christopher's
penis was in a styrofoam ice cooler.
"Chris is just plain lucky," said the surgeon who spent eight hours
reattaching the penis. "Believe it or not, the perfume turned out to be very
fortuitous. The high alcohol content, which must have been excruciatingly
painful, helped sterilize the wound. Also, aside from its being removed,
the damage caused by the dog's teeth to the penis per se is minimal. It's
really a very stringy piece of flesh. Mr. Coulter stands an excellent
chance of regaining the use of his limb because of this."
Washington Animal Control has no plans to seize Rudy.
© 1996 Peter Langston