Fun_People Archive
29 Nov
The perfect perfect rejection rejection letter

Date: Wed, 29 Nov 95 01:06:38 -0800
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: The perfect perfect rejection rejection letter

Forwarded-by: Ninafel@aol.com
Forwarded-by: CarlaLC

Herbert A. Millington
Chair - Search Committee
412A Clarkson Hall
Whitson University
College Hill, MA  34109

Dear Professor Millington,

Thank you for your letter of March 16.  After careful consideration, I
regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me
an assistant professor position in your department.

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually
large number of rejection letters.  With such a varied and promising
field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in
rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs
at this time.  Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant
professor in your department this August.  I look forward to seeing you then.

Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,
Chris L. Jensen

© 1995 Peter Langston