Top ten things that will get you kicked out of a bookstore
Date: Tue, 24 Oct 95 22:14:16 -0700
From: Peter Langston <psl>
Subject: Top ten things that will get you kicked out of a bookstore
Forwarded-by: firstname.lastname@example.org (Keith Bostic)
Forwarded-by: carolyn meinel <email@example.com>
From: Robert H. Fritz <firstname.lastname@example.org>
TOP TEN THINGS THAT WILL GET YOU KICKED OUT OF A BOOKSTORE:
1. Sneak up behind someone reading a romance novel and make kissing noises.
2. Throw a book-signing party -- even though you haven't written a book.
3. Lick a cookbook, pause, shake your head, and move on to the next one.
4. Carry out a stack of Shirley MacLaine's books; tell the clerk you paid
for them in a previous life.
5. Shout really loudly, "Hey look, everybody! 'Penis' is in the dictionary!"
6. Ask if there's a Books on Tape version of "Mein Kampf" read by Carol
7. Sweep the science fiction books off the shelf and scream, "Nothing but
8. Return a copy of the Bible; say you couldn't find Waldo in it anywhere.
9. Loudly announce that you have naked photos of Nancy Drew.
10. Push over bookshelves like giant Dominoes.
© 1995 Peter Langston