Fun_People Archive
10 Nov
Dirty tactics in the telecommunication trenches...

Date: Thu, 10 Nov 94 13:06:04 PST
To: Fun_People
Subject: Dirty tactics in the telecommunication trenches...

Forwarded-by: bostic@CS.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic)
Forwarded-by: cate3@netcom.com (Henry Cate)
Forwarded-by: George_Cross@qm.ctc.contel.com (George Cross)
Newsgroups: comp.dcom.telecom
From: Advertising Age, January 7, 1991, p24

The contest was to predict the next, even nastier pitch for AT&T LD.
The winners are quoted below.

Frequent repeat entry prototype:

"So I go to pick up Bobby from the daycare center and he's not there.
I get home, the phone's ringing and it's them.  The guy says, 'Lady,
we've got your kid.  Say something to mommy, Bob. (SCREAM).  Please
note, Mrs. Sanderson, the fiber-optic clarity of your son's ...'"
 
First Prize:

So the guy says, "Hi, I'm Willie Horton and MCI has given me this job
as part of their new work-release program.  Let's get together and
talk about switching over."

      -- Randy Dumouchel, copywriter, Primm & Co., Norfolk, VA.

Second Prize:

I just wanted directory assistance for Montana and the next thing I
know I'm talking to Mozambique.  So call MCI for credit and I get a
recording -- of Roseanne Barr singing.  When the operator comes on I
say, "AT&T never put me on hold."  She says, "Sweetie, AT&T never had
a nasty infection like the one I got."

      -- Eric Gutierrez, actor/copywriter, New York

Third Prize:

I hear this crash and I find a rock, wrapped in paper, next to my
living room window.  I open up the note and it says, "You want it in
writing?  You got it.  Next time, take the call.  MCI.  We know where
you live."

     -- Mary Hoppin, consumer services manager, Asian Sources
        Publications, Hong Kong

Honorable Intention:

So the guy says "Paul, if you don't switch we're gonna have to fire-bomb
your house."  And I say, "Fire-bomb my house?  AT&T never threatened
me like that."  And he says, "You're not dealing with AT&T."

     -- Paul Gosselin, free-lance copywriter, Nashville

© 1994 Peter Langston